Another Story About Winky

This is another attempt at adding pictures to a narrative. I apologize again for all the dick pics. 

The story is a work of fiction though my wife does spank me from time to time and when I ask for that sort of attention. Though a work of fantasy, I would love to be treated this way. I assure one and all that my wife loves me and we have a delightful, strong, and satisfying marriage in every way. Not sure why I feel it is necessary to write that but sometimes I think in this twisted world of sexual explicit material we visit, it is sometimes lost that we are normal people with normal interests, hobbies, jobs, careers, families, relationships, etc.

Something I should note, however, is that I almost believe that my sexual orientation is as a spankophile. It is what I want most and find most satisfying. Even before I knew what sex was, spanking interested me even to the point of obsession. As I grew older, I struggled to silence this part of me and just enjoy what 'normal' men were interested in: boobs, vaginas, shapely women, intercourse, blowjobs... It didn't work. I prayed for salvation even. Nothing. For decades, I lived with guilt and shame that spanking was what I wanted.

To be clear, I like all spanking. I like to spank and I like to be spanked. Gender doesn't matter. For me, spanking is sex and sex is spanking. A spanking can and perhaps should involve arousal, ejaculation, and orgasm. Admittedly this is not depicted in porn in the USA because of Meese Commission Report that won't allow BDSM and explicit sexuality in the same work.

This, then, is why I write about it. There is no porn for what I like. I have to grow my own, as it were.

All that to say, enjoy another of Winkie's adventures.

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Simply put, "no squirties without spankees."

I should explain. Even though I'm all grown up, I still just have a little boy penis:

My wife says he is cute but not really big enough for sex. He's doesn't get big enough and when we used to have sex, I would pop too soon. It wasn't any fun for her so we don't do that anymore.

Of course, I want to still but she doesn't think I deserve to even have a hard penis much less orgasm and ejaculate. Her reasoning is that if she can't use my penis, neither should I.

As you can imagine, it didn't take long before she noticed me being hard, and then not. She also discovered that my pajamas would have crusty spots on the front from when I would have wet dreams or would just hump a pillow to make my "morning wood" go away.

She said that little boys that are naughty with their pee-pees should get spankees. Not spankings: spankees. She didn't want me to think that I was a big boy getting a big boy punishment. Nope, just a little boy getting a little spankee on his boom-boom for being a naughty little boy with his naughty little pee-pee.

It was really difficult for me at first especially because my little 'spankees' were really hard and sometimes made me cry. One time, we were just spooning in bed and my penis got hard against her bottom. I tried to be really still so she wouldn't notice but I was wearing flannel pajamas and, well, I couldn't hide what happened next.

I apologized right away. Before it happened even, I said, "oh no, I'm sorry," and I even sounded like a little boy. Then it was happening and it was so fast too. Just squirt, squirt, squirt and all done. I rolled away and it was just like a flashback to when I was a little boy.

Before I even knew what masturbation or sex was, I would wake up humping my mattress in the morning. My penis would be tingling and then I would feel really good. Then, I would lay still for a few minutes waking up more before almost always realizing how bad I had to pee. I would usually run to the potty.

One day, it felt different and even better at the end. When I rolled out of bed, my pajama bottoms were a little bit wet. I figured a little pee had escaped. Next day, the same thing. After a while, it didn't even bother me that my bottoms were a little bit sticky in the morning and crusty at night. Boys are like that: totally oblivious to the obvious.

Funny thing was, that was in winter when I would wear my red flannel pajamas. When it was warm, I wore the thin lightblue bottoms only. They weren't as soft so it wasn't as nice to rub the bed in the morning and when I got up, I realized there was an obvious wet spot that I couldn't hide from the rest of the family.

That was the end of humping the bed and I figured out masturbation pretty quick after that. That is until the following fall when the red flannel pajamas came back out.

At first, it was how good they felt in the morning against my morning hard penis that surprised me. Then one day, I did my bed humping again, and it just felt right and wonderful. Then I was getting hard putting them on before bed. I was even humping the bed both before I fell asleep and when I woke up in the morning. The wet spot would be covered mostly by my pajama top and the dark red plaid nicely hid the evidence of my masturbatory activities. Most days, I would wear my pajamas to breakfast or longer with the cool wet spot tickling my tummy as it slowly dried. Though I could smell my acrid semen, I figured no one else could or could identify what it was they smelled. I was washing my pajamas a lot because they would get crusty and not feel as good. A soft warm pair fresh from the dryer was amazing and I couldn't wait after putting them on to get into bed and take care of business.

And speaking of 'business', I wouldn't masturbate any other way. Considering that I was ejaculating twice a day most of the time, I didn't really need to. When I did get the urge during the day, it became fun to wait until bedtime. My parents loved that I wouldn't argue about going to bed on time.

Then I was getting a hard-on just seeing flannel pajamas. At a department store one time, I walked by a pajama display and was instantly erect. I didn't make a scene but I knew enough to know that what was happening in my pants was something I didn't want to advertise to my mommy or anyone else in the store. Of course, even fully erect, my hard little penis wasn't really going to show through my jeans.

If I was alone in the house, I would sometimes put on my pajamas and then find something to hump until I squirted. It felt naughty and that made it even better. I made rules like that I couldn't change until I was dry or that I couldn't close the drapes while I did my humping. It made it all riskier, naughtier, and more exciting.

It never took very long but there would be a moment when I would know that I could still stop but that in just a few seconds, I wouldn't be able to and the inevitable would happen. As bad as it looked to be humping the couch cushions, the arm of the chair, or even just the fluffy shag rug, I knew that in a couple seconds, I was going to be very obviously convulsing in orgasm and that would look really bad. Anyone that looked in the window or came home would see one exceedingly naughty little boy doing something very naughty indeed. I would glance at the window not sure if I did or did not want to see someone looking in before collapsing into my orgasm.

Of course, the risk was higher when others were home and the risk seemed to make it better. Any time I could be wearing my pajamas around the house like on a weekend morning or while watching TV late in the evening, I would be in my comfy flannel pajamas. When I thought I had the room to myself, I would get busy.

The most risky time was when I was watching TV with my older sister one night. During a commercial, she ran to the bathroom and I immediately rolled over on the couch and started humping a throw pillow. My penis was quickly erect and tingling in no time but I was very worried she was coming back so I stopped and got back sitting but with my hard little penis slightly tenting the front of my pajamas.

During the show and with her sitting a chair just three feet to my right, I marveled that my hardness was hidden by the folds of my trusty red flannel pajama bottoms and the matching button down top. Even when it pulsed and throbbed, the flannel just barely moved but gently tickled the tip. The teasing kept me aroused and wanting.

I stayed hard and thoroughly distracted hoping she would have to pee again. Luckily, she was drinking a huge glass of iced tea and nature called at another commercial break. I needed my relief but I froze momentarily in fearful indecision. Deciding a little stimulation was better than none, I rolled into position on my throw pillow lover and with my legs spread wide and hands holding tightly to the back of the couch, I ground my hard little penis into the soft pillow.

From behind, there could be no doubt what I was doing and I knew how wrong it was. My parents and our church very clearly and loudly taught that sex was only between a husband and a wife. Though no one talked about masturbation, I assumed that it was sex and since I wasn't married, this was just as bad. In other words, it wasn't like my sister was going to walk into the room and laugh if she caught me doing this; I was going to be in big trouble.

That fear of getting caught and the repercussions if I did almost caused me to get caught. The fear excited me but also distracted me. The excitement drove me on but the fear delayed the inevitable. I twisted around almost instinctively to check for witnesses when I knew I could still stop. The doorway was clear but I heard the toilet flush. I knew I had only seconds before being discovered so I was giving up but it was like my penis knew it was now-or-never. I rolled back to sitting on the couch but felt my orgasm slowly and inevitably building as I did so. I willed it not to happen but my will was no match for my libido. I fluffed my pajama top to be better cover my throbbing erection.

It was one of the slowest and longest orgasms of my life or at least seemed to be. I froze in place feeling the tingling at the tip of penis spread down my legs and up my stomach and even my nipples tingled. I kept from shaking best I could and tried to keep my face relaxed. She was going to be in the room at any second but it wasn't until she was in the room when my penis finally start spurting. I gasped and quickly looked up to see if she noticed what was happening to me. Apparently it looked like I was startled and she jokingly apologized for sneaking up on me. "Oh, it's OK," I said in a strained voice as semen filled my pajama bottoms.

After my penis softened, I surreptitiously inspected the mess when I was sure she wasn't looking. Probably because I was sitting when it happened, there was a surprisingly small wet spot on my bottoms and even that was easily covered by my long pajama top. I didn't dare look inside but I could feel a puddle of semen on my stomach. Some of it was starting to flow to the right. I thought maybe if I re-positioned, I could keep it more contained but when I propped myself up, it all started to flow down toward my soft penis and sagging testicles. Next thing I knew, I felt warm fluid flow around my scrotum and collect at the top of my thighs which I kept tightly together.

The smell of semen filled the air and for one of the first times, I associated the acrid odor with my own emissions. The excitement, fear, shame, and a thoroughly amazing orgasm was imprinted on my mind. I was never as close to being caught again after that and it wasn't until after my wife made the rule that I even had another orgasm where I wasn't stimulating myself while it happened.

If I didn't have a fetish for flannel pajamas before that night, I did afterwards. All the components came to be associated with the red flannel. I got a pair that year on Christmas morning and my reaction was genuine joy but also an embarrassing and difficult to hide hard-on.

Over the years, I started to feel a little ashamed that I was squirting into my pajamas all the time. The wet spot on my pajamas would stick to my penis and when I moved to get out of bed or just rollover, it would get all over my stomach. Worse yet, my mommy was so moved by how much I loved my Christmas present of red flannel pajamas that she got me a new pair every year and still does. Now I just get an erection whenever I open a present from my mom.

Even today, my favorite pajamas are red flannel:

As I rolled away from my wife that night, I was transported back to when I was just a little masturbating boy having his own semen smear all over his tummy before going to sleep. I didn't get to go to sleep yet that night though. No, I had to get up, clean myself up, rinse off the mess I made in my pajamas, and then fetch the hairbrush. My spankee that night was super hard. I went to sleep on my tummy. With horror, I woke up the next morning hard as a diamond and gently humping the bed. My sore bottom convinced me to stop that right away.

Since that spankee, I've been very careful because 'unauthorized emissions', as she calls them, receive the harshest punishment. She almost never gives me permission to make my squirties but if I ask first and show her my hard little problem, she doesn't seem to spank as hard or maybe it is because at least part of my spanking happens before the squirts come out.

Most of the time, I can just think about something else and my hard little guy will get soft again. Then I'll have a day that is difficult. Sexy thoughts will invade my thinking and make me get an erection. Of course, I know that my bottom will get a spankee but that doesn't help me get control. Quite the opposite.

The spankees do hurt but a spankee means that I get to squirt. It is all getting twisted together in my head. A red bottom means a happy penis. The more I need my little orgasm, the more the cost to my bottom seems like a small price to pay.

And that is how we get to today. My little guy needs his relief. He's hard all the time and I can't think of anything besides sexy things. It is starting to hurt even.

I went to the bathroom to think about what will happen next and took this picture:

This is as hard as he gets. Just a couple strokes and the squirts would happen. I want to so bad but that would be too naughty.

She's sitting in the family room. I've got my towel and the hairbrush. My bottom tingles in anticipation and my little guy is twitching.

I'm just going to leave him sticking out. She will think that is silly and cute but also naughty. My PJs will be off soon enough. I only get spankees completely naked. She will spank me in a couple different positions like standing up or on all fours. She will say that she is seeing if I will get soft. She knows I won't and even makes fun of how I twitch, throb, and hump the air while she spanks me.

After my bottom is warmed up and red, and my penis is still hard, one of a couple things will happen. She might just send me to potty to go make my squirties. Or she might just make me do it right in front of her. Either way, she will tell me to hurry up and if I do it in front of her, she will just 'tsk-tsk' when it happens and say how dirty and icky it is. If I'm in the potty, she will sometimes stand outside knocking and asking how it is going, if I'm done yet and telling me to hurry up.

If I am lucky and I am usually lucky, thank goodness, she will put the towel over her thighs and let me lay down over her lap. Then, she will spank me--but usually not too hard--until the squirts come out. I don't know why, but I like that best.

Still, it doesn't matter how the squirts come out because after they are out, I always get a super hard spanking with the hairbrush. It hurts really bad and sometimes I even will cry. It is all embarrassing but crying is the worst. I don't feel like a man at all. It is like it gets stripped right off me and I'm just a little boy again. My penis is soft, my bottom burns, my eyes leak tears, and I beg and plead for forgiveness and mercy.

When it is over, she will sometimes just hug me before I go clean up but other times she'll want me to give her an orgasm with my tongue. She will tap the brush threateningly against the open palm of her left hand as I get in position. I haven't failed yet so I don't know if the threat is real and hope to never find out.

UDPATE -- Book! I Wrote a Book!

I've taken all of my published and unpublished short stories and compiled them into an ebook (and maybe even a paperback if I can figure that part of the direct publishing thing out). If you are into what I am into, this is the book for you. And it is long. Really long.

Check it out, well, you can't; Amazon took it down for violating probably all sorts of decency rules. They really should have taken it down because of all the spelling and grammar problems not to mention some of the really terrible writing in places. Alas, the problem of being a self-published author with no editor.

For those late to the party, all of my stories have something to do with spanking mixed with involuntary, inappropriate, or otherwise untimely sexual response. The boys (this is a book about boys and men who are treated like boys) all muster an erection during their spankings and usually ejaculate or orgasm as well. That is a big part of what is going on but there is plenty of embarrassment, crying, shame, ruined orgasms, and sex as well.

What now? I had taken many of the stories in this blog and turned them into teasers for the book which, by the way, totally wasn't selling at all. I expanded a few and fixed some problems in a couple of them. I had just recently completed an editing pass over the whole to repair some of the more embarrassing problems with grammar, homonyms, and really just terrible writing. I am going to put all of those back into the blog here.

Writing a book was an accomplishment for me. Writing is fun and I do plenty of it for work. I've long considered writing a mainstream work of fiction or nonfiction. In the end, it seems fairly masturbatory. Very few people can make a living writing books but everyone seems to think that they have something to say. If it isn't going to sell and will just make me look like a douche (I can just hear myself saying, "I'm an author," at dinner party; it makes me cringe just thinking about it) then I may as well write a book that I want to read and will enjoy writing.

In the end, that is really what this is all about. Writing about spanking is therapy for me. I not only get my writing fix but I also get to explore my fantasies, work through my myriad of issues, and create something that is purely my own. It is like gardening: no one gives a fuck about anyone's garden. The pleasure it gives the gardener is that it is their garden that they cultivated.

This is my garden. It isn't my life's work, how I will be remembered by my friends and family after I'm gone, or any of that. It is a thing I do that makes me happy. I'm a little proud of it and do wish that I was asked to speak at conferences, known as an expert, made money from royalty checks that just appear in my mailbox, and was asked to sign copies of my book. It would be nice.

What is also nice is getting up early most morning and writing a few paragraphs about spanking while making a little tent and wet spot in my pajamas.

It would also be nice hearing that someone else liked my stories. Let me know; it would make my day.

Winky Has an Adventure

I thought it would be fun to write a little story from a slightly different perspective. Sorry about all the dick pics. Enjoy!

Winky looks nervous. We are on the way home to get a spanking and the little fella isn’t very happy. He probably doesn’t like being all exposed but the rule is “naughty little boys don’t get pants until after spankees are all done.” 


When we found out that she knew we had been naughty, he got all big and hard (he’s a grower and clearly not a show’er). But then we got naked and started driving and he got super shy. 

I don’t know why he isn’t excited; It won’t be too long before he will get to make squirties just like a big penis. She’ll put down a towel under my pee-pee and if I concentrate super hard during my spanking and wiggle just right, the white sticky stuff will squirt out and for a couple seconds, the spanking won’t hurt at all! Afterward, though, it will hurt real bad and Winky will get even smaller than in the picture. She spanks with the hairbrush after Winky makes squirties because she says it is super extra naughty when the squirts happen. She hates it when I make my messes and I get extra spanks if any of it gets on her.

I hope he squirts out a big puddle today. The big ones usually feel really good. She sounded mad on the phone though like she is going to give me lots of spanking before I get to wiggle on the towel and probably a lot after my pee-pee makes his messy too.

I don’t like spankee time ‘cause it hurts my bottom but I really don’t like it when she makes me do squirties first or before most of my punishment. When my pee-pee is hard and full, she knows that hurts less than after he’s empty and soft again. Winky likes to wait too, I think; he always makes bigger puddles when I get most of my spanks before I do wiggles.

I have to put my towel under Winky before every spanking in case I have an accident or leak. He leaks sometimes like he is crying too.

She was mad at me for not shaving so I am getting extra spanks for having stubble when I got home. I had to get in the shower, shave, and then get some spanking on my wet bottom. That hurts real bad. She says that I am going to have more extra spanks later too.

She’s pretty mad because Winky made a mess in my pajamas while I was sleeping. I tried to tell her that it wasn’t my fault but that just made her angrier.

He sure gets hard during my spankings! Sometimes I even think my sticky stuff is about to squirt out.

For this spanking, I had to kneel next to the ottoman. She was using the paddle that makes both my cheeks bounce, jiggle, sting, and burn at the same time. Winky seems to like the paddle cause he gets super hard but I can almost never make squirties when he doesn’t touch anything. I still wiggle a lot but even though he is so hard and ready to make, he just bobs in the air right over my towel.

When he is all hard like this, it is like Winky thinks he is just like those big penises that get to have sexy time with girls. I don’t get to do that. She says that because my Winky is just a small pee-pee that squirts too quickly, he wouldn’t be able to make a girl feel good.

He makes a lot of the yummy slippery drips like he wants to be ready in case she changes her mind. Or maybe they are tears because he is so sad and frustrated. He wants it so bad and she won’t even touch him.

I’ve had a bunch of spankings and my bottom really hurts. She let me keep my squirts inside for all the spankings so far. I’ve been crying a little and little Winky leaked all over my towel and my legs too.

It is time to make squirties so I got to put my towel down on the bed and now when I get this next spanking, I might be able to wiggle a little. If I do it just right and concentrate really hard, Winky will tingle and I’ll be able to make my squirts.

She has the hairbrush. I’m scared of the hairbrush. My bottom is already very ouchy and the hairbrush is super ouchy too.

Winky made a messy! The spanks weren’t very hard while I was wiggling and so it wasn’t too hard to make. As soon as the squirts started though, I think she started spanking a lot harder. She didn’t stop until I was begging and crying.

She let me take a picture but I’m going to get my extra spanks now. I hate extra spanks.

Owwiee!! My bottom is on fire! My little winky got super small again now that he made a messy. The sticky stuff is all over my tummy too (but I didn’t take a picture of that). He didn’t make a big puddle today; I think he’s shy ‘cause of the camera. The tingles felt good though and it always feels good when he makes the squirts even if they are little ones like today.

It makes me sad that Winky gets me in trouble so that I have to have spankees. I wish he was a big penis so that we could make our squirts into a woman. He makes me dream about doing sex things that I’m not allowed to do.

I like being little again. I don’t think about sexy things when Winky is soft. For a day or two, I won’t think as much about naughty things. If I do, my ouchy bottom will remind we to think of something else!

I’ll be good today, but tomorrow the bad thoughts will start again and the day after, well, I probably won’t be able to think about anything else. In just a couple days, Winky won’t be able to stay small again and if she catches me big and hard or he makes naughty in my pajamas or if I am super naughty and play with Winky even a little bit, it will be spankee time again. I hope my bottom feels better by then.

Thanks for reading about Winky’s adventure!

Last Time

My last spanking was actually a couple months ago. Usually it is more frequent but I had an injury and during the recovery, I have had to avoid high stress situations. I had had a couple good days in a row and so we took a risk with some "play time".

I was given spankings naked in the bedroom with a variety of implements. In between spankings, I would do a chore. We always start with the lexan paddle because it is a good warmup paddle with me draped over her lap. It is stingy and gets the blood flowing without being too intense.

The game for the night was that I was being spanked for having a naughty erection. This is mostly in my head; my wife doesn't mind spanking me but she doesn't care to participate in the fantasy. This turns out to work because she makes up her own storyline which seems to entertain her just fine. Anyway, I am naughty and need a spanking because I am too aroused to be at all good in bed; I would just squirt instantly, make a mess, and not satisfy her. So, I get a spanking to teach me to control my naughty penis.

After the warmup spanking, I was nicely erect and went to swap laundry or empty the dishwasher or whatever but when I was done with the chore, I wanted to present myself fully erect for my next spanking. So, after each chore that usually softened me up a little, I would hide in the hallway outside the bedroom and play with myself until I was very erect and even a little close to orgasm. I wanted to look like I was ready to pop when I presented myself for another spanking.

Another rule is that if I do have an accident, I always get a hard and fast spanking with the hairbrush paddle afterwards. Of course, eventually, I always have an accident and I always get a very painful dose of my most feared paddle. Thus, edging in the hallway is dangerous and I have to be careful but any spanking where my penis touches something is risky as well.

That night, I had a couple spankings standing next to the bed with my penis resting on my cummy towels (just in case). The first one was with a leather tawse and the second with a long frat style paddle. I almost had an accident both times. I love the idea of both of us seeing my naughty ejaculation as it happens during the spanking. Usually the hairbrush paddle is placed within reach wherever I am getting a spanking just in case a naughty accident happens.

I can't remember all the spankings but I think I was over her lap a couple more times getting a wooden spoon. I usually bend over an ottoman with my legs spread wide and my penis pointing down the side (very little stimulation that way) for some "detail" work with a wooden spoon as well.

At some point, my wife had put her favorite vibrator out on the bedside table charging. When I pointed at it, she said something about how I shouldn't have all the fun.

It was getting late and I was running out of chores so I said that I thought I might have an accident during my next spanking. This is code for "spanking me until I squirt". There are a couple positions where this works well. The easiest is over her lap so I can wiggle my way to a little squirt but standing next to the bed was working all night so I asked for that.

Next to the bed or a counter is tricky. My penis lays on my cummy towels but it doesn't really press down on them so it is light stimulation. She usually spanks me with the "Wal-Mart" spoon which is stingy and motivating but not withering. Sometimes she will "encourage" me with something heavier making me struggle to achieve my orgasm. The light stimulation is enough if the spanking isn't too intense but if she gets impatient, I have to really hump obscenely to get enough stimulation. I think she likes it when I have to struggle. I prefer when I just can't control myself and it sneaks up on me. I always have to ask for permission regardless, she always denies me, I aways try to obey, and I am always a naughty, disobedient little boy that makes a mess on the nice clean towels. Again.

Anyway, it took a little while and some strong encouragement. Just before I made my little messy squirts, I apparently did something or made some sound that she knows I make when I am about to pop and she switched to the hairbrush paddle as I begged to be allowed to make squirties. For a couple seconds, I enjoyed a powerful orgasm (yay, sometimes I just ejaculate), made a big messy on my towels, and then found myself laying facedown on the bed getting my bottom blistered. I tried to be brave but it hurt so bad I had tears in my eyes and handfuls of bedspread in my tightly clenched hands. I eventually started protesting and she asked if I had enough. I was very quick to affirm that yes, I had learned my lesson.

Sometimes when I get up, I am disappointed with my emission but that night I made not only a big mess on my towels but it was all over my stomach penis and testicles. Also, I had softened right up and my penis was small, pink, and coated with semen. It was hard to believe that my little penis could have made so much semen; it was like some other man had ejaculated on my genitals. Combined with the humiliating sting on my bottom, I really felt like a punished little boy.

I got cleaned up and showed my appreciation to my wife. She didn't end up needing the vibrator after all.

Too Soon

Oh no, this is bad. This is real bad. I shouldn't have even been touching myself. I know it is risky to do that and then I heard her walking down the stairs and something about that was just too much for me to handle and I guess I lost control.

I have been waiting downstairs in the family room for the next part of my spanking. She had already given me a good long warm-up and then two harder spankings. One was with a big wooden paddle that stings a lot. I was bent over the edge of the bed and some pillows for that spanking. Then, after a little while, she used a big wooden spoon on my bottom while I was wrapped over an ottoman. Both of them were hard spankings. I was making all sorts of little boy 'ouchie' noises.

Those spankings were just warm-up for what was going to happen to me in the family room. My spanking time was going to end with her using the little hairbrush paddle while I humped and wiggled my way to a frustrating little orgasm over her lap. Of course, after that, it was going to be really painful but there is something that is so terrifyingly arousing about knowing that my spanking was going to really happen after those little squirts leave my penis.

Actually, it is exciting because what comes next is terrifying, terrible, and inevitable. The sting of that feared paddle makes my bottom jiggle, sting, and catch fire while I fight to have my few seconds of painful pleasure. Sometimes it is just a relief as my frustration oozes out of the little guy. Other times, it is like the pain and struggle heighten my orgasm. It builds as I fight for release and when it finally happens, it is explosive and momentarily blocks out the assault on my bottom. Of course, it is over in a blink of an eye as the burn building on my bottom suddenly invades my consciousness crushing out the pleasure, ruining my orgasm, and leaving me wrecked and writhing.

I had been sent down to wait in the family room after getting the spoon upstairs. The spoon is a precision instrument. Wherever it lands, bee stings emerge. I pulled out a bar stool to sit on while waiting. She likes to walk in and see me nervously sitting there with my hard penis poking up from my lap. The bee stings fading on my bottom woke up as I sat down on the stool. Pre-cum emerged from my excited little guy. The stings weren't terrible but more like reminders of what was coming up next.

I touched my pee-pee and, of course, it felt great. I like to gently fondle myself while waiting. I know I shouldn't and that accidents could happen but I like being so excited and right on the edge. My wife likes seeing my excitement and frustration when she walks in. Sitting on the bar stool makes me look even more like a little boy too. I have to sit up straight and probably because I am nervous, I always just keep my legs together. Of course, my testicles would be uncomfortably crushed between my thighs so I have to position my pink shaved scrotum on top of my legs. This makes my little penis look positively tiny as he just barely emerges from my lap. The head gets a bluish tint especially in this position as I sit rigid like a choir boy. Pre-cum squeezes out of the tiny slit and I can't help but get it on my fingers. I mean, I can't really stroke the shaft like this so I just play with the tip and the super sensitive spot on the underside right below the head that I can't seem to stop touching.

The funny thing is that sitting like this, it seems strange to even refer to the little guy by adult words like penis, erection, dick or cock. Even though he is erect, he is just a little pee-pee. I've read of people using words like dicklet or boy-clitty when talking about men with little penises. I don't think the guys attached to those little members are going to get their bottoms spanked like little boys. No, I have a pee-pee and though touching it feels good like a regular penis, little boys that get spankings just have little pee-pees. That's all. Maybe when I finally outgrow needing to get spankings I can graduate to a dicklet but for now, nope, just a little pee-pee poking up from my lap.

Steadily oozing pre-cum made my fingers all slippery. A little of that stuff goes a long way and more was coming out than was needed to lube me up. It is silly that my pee-pee wants to do big penis things.

She made me wait only a little while and I just absentmindedly played with myself the whole time. I was right near the edge which is nothing I haven't done before. Then I heard the footsteps in the hall and if she had come downstairs, everything would have have been fine. But she didn't. She walked into the kitchen first and I had just a little more time to play with my little guy and that extra little time combined with the knowledge that she was on her way right now was a little too much. I think she put something away in the kitchen and was coming back down the hall when I realized that my penis play had gone on too long. Suddenly, as she started down the steps, I started to squirt.

It didn't shoot all over because I'm not a shooter; I'm a drooler if anything. I snapped my hand away as if it would help stop the inevitable but semen just pulsed out and ran down my little guy. I watched in shock as I had a complete ejaculation in just seconds that made a huge mess all over my tight little scrotum.

The horror of the moment didn't detract from it being a thoroughly wonderful orgasm. In fact, perhaps the horror made it even better. The contractions made my bottom tingled where it had felt like bee stings before. Something about sitting with my legs tight together, back straight, prim and proper, made it feel different than normal too and different can be better sometimes.

Of course, unlike my wife's orgasms that seem to go on for minutes, mine was over before she even got down the stairs and the reality was setting in as she walked around the corner.

There was no point in hiding what happened and it didn't matter anyway. The spanking was going to happen. Though we both like me to squirm my way to my little squirts over her lap, she knows that if an accident happens before then that am I still supposed to get spanked with the dreaded little hairbrush paddle anyway.

"I'm sorry," I blurted before she even noticed what happened. "It was an accident. I couldn't help it," I added pointlessly.

"What?" she said before pausing as her eyes caught sight of my still twitching little guy squeezing out the last drops of semen. "Oh, well, I see. That is a surprise," she said a little taken aback. I was a real mess and she isn't one of those people that likes anything about semen. The sticky mess had flowed quickly down the underside of my pee-pee and over my tight scrotum before pooling up in a little puddle between my legs. I had to keep my legs tightly together or it would pour right onto the seat of the chair. I was happy that I was sitting on one of my towels.

"I'm sorry," I offered again. "It just happened," I added running out of things to say.

She paused for a second not sure what to do next. I could almost see her reading through the playbook looking for the correct response to this admittedly rare situation.

"Please," I whined. "Do I have to get a spanking now?" I asked leading her on. "I promise I didn't mean to make squirtees." I couldn't believe that I was staying in the game. I could probably get out of it. I mean, it was over, right? I had my little spanking and emptied all my sticky stuff all over myself. It had even felt good and I was embarrassed and humiliated just like always. My bottom was pretty worked over too. It was going to sting for hours more and I would even feel it tomorrow I'm sure. I think she would completely understand if we were done for the night.  What was I doing this for? 

I didn't know why, but I felt like I needed to push a little, "I don't need more spanking; it was just an accident. I'll be good. I promise it will never, ever happen again. I promise!" I said completely in character. My softening penis twitched and pulsed a little as it retreated.

She quickly seemed to remember the rule. Nodding she said, "no, baby, you still need a spanking. Get up, fetch the paddle and don't you dare make a mess." 

It was done. This was going to happen and I finally understood why it had to happen: I needed it. The part of the spanking where I bravely take the pain and become a big boy again instead of a little baby hadn't happened. I need that but I also need to pay for my ill timed orgasm. What made it such a good little orgasm was knowing that those few seconds of pleasure were going to followed by a hard and thorough spanking. If I get away with it this time, then I won't be afraid next time and it won't be as good. It has to happen, I have to be made an example of even to myself. This is an example of what happens when little boys squirt all over themselves. Even though I made the rules, I can't break them.

Still feeling the afterglow a little, I started to get up and felt the stickiness all over my scrotum drip between my legs. So that I wouldn't drip on the floor, I grabbed my towel and held it against my crotch like a diaper as I stood up. The position must have looked pretty silly because I thought I heard my wife snicker a little as she turned and walked to the spanking chair. The little paddle was just on the bar where I had put it earlier so I didn't have to go far to fetch it. It is still always so awful having to bring her the paddle she is going to spank me with.

I have to say that the little walk to the chair was so much worse this time. Usually I have an erect penis just dying for release. He would lead me over to her like he was pointing the way. The start of the spanking meant that a squirt was about to happen and like Pavlov's dogs, he would drool in anticipation.

There was nothing good to look forward to today. My penis was shrinking fast and my bottom seemed swollen and sore already. I didn't want this spanking at all. My legs slid together lubricated by the slippery semen that had dripped between them. It felt sort of gross and it dawned on me that I was going to feel this lubrication as I kicked my legs during my spanking too.

I didn't really start to cry but I was feeling so sorry for myself that I was sniffling a little as I handed her the little ouchie paddle. She just nodded to her lap. I wanted to beg her not to spank me but I knew what I was supposed to say--what I had to say. "Please spank my naughty bottom really hard so that I learn to be a good boy," I whispered.

"Really hard?" she asked teasing me a little.

I paused, "yes, please. I was very naughty and, um, I, ah, need a good spanking," I stated quietly.

"OK, climb on over so I can blister your bottom," she said like an executioner to the criminal.

Keeping the towel in place was a little tricky but I climbed over her lap and kept it in place enough to keep my mess to myself. I wiggled into place but froze when I felt the cool wood tap my right cheek lightly. It was gone and then, well, then I got a real spanking. It wasn't at all like when I would get a spanking that would cause me to twitch and rub my sensitive penis on the towel. No, this was just stinging fire that was instantly blinding.

I was kicking and wiggling right away and my ouchie noises were louder than ever. I was sort of aware that she was alternating spanks between cheeks and that she was making sure everything was uniformly covered and on fire. Mostly I was just aware that the spanking was mind-erasingly intense. It seemed to last forever but it was probably only minutes later when she stopped. "Are you going to be a good boy now?" she asked.

"Ow, ow, owie," was all I could say as I tried to catch my breath and gather my thoughts. The spanking started again and I bucked and kicked wildly. I heard my own voice say "yes, yes, I'll be good!" loudly.

She stopped spanking me. "Are you sure?" she asked.

"Yes, ow, I won't..." and then I seemed to forget what I wouldn't do.

The spanking started again and she asked without stopping, "what won't you do again?"

I was falling apart. "I, ow, I won't, owie, no, owie, I won't make naughty squirties," I said hoping this was correct.

"OK," she said but kept spanking. "I hope you've learned your lesson, little boy. Now hold still for just a little more just to be sure."

The last little bit is just a blur but I remember it being hard and fast. I didn't stay still at all because I just couldn't. But then it really was over and her hand patting my bottom replaced the wood of the paddle.

"That's enough, for now," she teased. "Get up unless you want some more." I was off her lap in a flash. Of course, standing in front of her was no fun either. My brave erection was replaced by a soft little boy pee-pee and droopy testicles. Though the towel had absorbed most of my spillage, there was still some signs of my accident in the creases of my scrotum and between my legs. I was still shaking from the painful paddling. Tears were in my eyes and though I wasn't really crying, I felt like I looked, well, like a freshly spanked little boy. If I was smaller, I would have wanted to sit on her lap and hug her until she made me feel like everything was all better.

"Can, <sniff> can I have a hug," I asked softly. She nodded and I got on my knees, wrapped my arms around her, and buried my face in her neck. "Thank you for the spanking me," I said between sniffles. I wiped the tears in my eyes on her neck and hugged her tight.

A Spanking Request Speech

I need my little speech to her to be tight, concise, and precise. Let's see how this sounds:

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I've been naughty and annoying by being totally obsessed about sex. It is getting in the way of my work, workouts, keeping the house together. In addition, I am being a pest while you are busy. I have to learn to control myself and I need to be punished for slacking off and being a pest.

I need to have a night of spanking and punishment to learn self control. I need to get a spanking every 20 minutes or so in the hopes that I will learn to control myself. You start out not very hard. As long as I am a good boy, the spankings won't be very hard. But if my penis stays hard, I can't stop playing with myself, or I try to make my penis feel good during a spanking, then they will get harder. You can make me do things that are embarrassing or uncomfortable like take you to dinner with a stinging bottom, go to the store seconds after getting a big spanking, putting something in my bottom, making me wear something like stockings, your underwear, or clothes that emphasize my silly erection or spanked bottom. I would even like you poking fun at my ignored erection and the pre-cum it vainly produces.

I know that if I have an accident, I will get a real bottom blistering with the little nasty paddle but we are both hoping that I will learn my lesson before that becomes necessary. However, as it gets late, it is clear that you need to resort to more drastic measures: I need to be forced to make a mess and get a blistering with the paddle.

You can choose how I make my squirt: teased with a spoon spanking over your lap (always good), sent away to take care of myself (not my favorite), teased with a vibrator until I squirt, or whatever your devious mind can come up with. However it happens, it should be short and as unfulfilling as possible; we are just solving a problem so that I will fully appreciate my last spanking of the night.

Then, after that task is out of the way, I need to immediately fetch the paddle and ask you to give me the hardest spanking of the night. And please do. I need to be proud of what I endured. I will ask for it to stop by saying "red light" so don't worry about it being too much until I say that even if there is a lot of kicking, wiggling, and "ouch" noises. 

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Let me know what you think! Leave me a comment, OK?

Self-spanking, Fleshlight, and Shame

I was in the shower obsessing about spanking and trying to get my nerve up to ask my wife to solve my problem when a funny thought crossed my mind. I have been toying with the idea of self-spanking and combining that with asking her to "finish me off" after I was well warmed up. I even blogged about my plan. Of course, having a plan and executing on the plan are two different things. I make a lot of plans.

Over the years, I have acquired a number of Fleshlights. These are basically male masturbation aids that are really quite fantastic experiences. I've had fun with them but not like some guys that do all sorts of unspeakable things with them. One of my favorite ways to play is to prop the "device" against a wall so that I have to hump it standing up. Of course, my favorite place is where there are mirrors so that I can watch myself over my shoulder. I like to watch how I have to hump the inanimate object and how I sort of convulse uncontrollably when I cum.

The dumb idea was to combine this with spanking myself. A while back, we tried having me stand at the bathroom counter facing the mirror while she spanked me. My erect penis rested on my cummy towels and I could hump the towels lightly while she blistered my bottom. The idea was that when I came, it would be more visible than when I squirt while over her lap. Perhaps it would be more dramatic, embarrassing, or even messy.

Anyway, it was a nifty idea but it didn't work out super great for a couple reasons. One was that I just didn't have enough downward pressure to create the necessary friction. Also, well, it just wasn't that dramatic. I was hoping to make a couple big squirts and then find myself unable to keep my spent member out of the puddle. I was hoping for a dramatic mess but instead it just drooled out like normal and I immediately shrunk leaving my little puddle sitting undisturbed.

The new idea was roughly the same thing except that I would put the Fleshlight on the counter instead of the towels. Then I would have something that would definitely provide enough stimulation for my little guy to work with while getting my bottom roasted.

I have several inserts depending on my mood. Some are just amazing while others are a little less intense and more suited for long edging sessions. To be honest, the real difference between intense and not so much is where all the good parts start; I'm not long enough to get to the good parts of some of them. I thought about how I would have to really pound on a low stimulation insert to get off but then decided that just being still in an intense insert would be delicious torture.

The problem is, however, that the one time my wife and I played with our respective toys together, she was, well, jealous of my Flashlight. She sort of liked it but didn't like seeing me screwing anything but her. This made me think that this was probably the sort of idea she wasn't going to go for but I decided that it would be interesting to try by myself anyway.

I decided on my favorite insert that gets me there super quick. I also decided on my little Lexan paddle to warm-up with and the hairbrush paddle to finish the job. I lubed up and sunk easily to my balls into the stimulating sleeve. Of course, it felt wonderful penetrating my pretend lover. I positioned myself at the counter holding the Fleshlight firmly on the counter with my left hand. Holding as still as I could, I did my best to self-spank myself with the Lexan paddle.

I tried not to move at all except to spank myself. This is actually tricky. Getting any sort of swing takes a certain amount of movement and each twitch in the sleeve easily eclipsed the sting on my bottom. I decided to switch to the wood paddle sooner than later.

Without a long warmup, the wooden brush was shockingly stingy right away. I rocked back and forth with the first couple swats and had no trouble enjoying the feeling of my penis attempting to fornicate with my inanimate lover. Looking down, I could see that I was completely buried in the perfect rubber vagina. Her glistening lips were stretched slightly around my little erection and appeared to be parted and sort of kissing my stomach. The cold of the counter against my scrotum contrasted dramatically with the warm wetness surrounding my desperate sex.

I tried to spank myself hard but anyone who has attempted self-spanking knows this is tricky. The body revolts against inflicting pain on itself. Still, I tried to light a fire on my own bottom alternating between cheeks and always trying to strike the sensitive sit spots. My bottom quickly had my attention and I decided to reward myself by humping a little when I took a spank directly on the crack. Left, right and then I pulled back a little, center, and back in. She accepted me lovingly and rewarded my bravery generously.

Again, left, right, and then center. Each center spank earned me a little thrust. The little thrusts, however, felt terrific and I realized my error: I wasn't going to last long. I was shaking trying to stay still and make it last and I spanked harder in a vain attempt to keep myself from going over the edge. Left, right, center, left, right, center, over and over.

I lost control and poured my seed into the vessel. She accepted it with only the slightest flexing of her perfect labia lips as I pumped out my semen. Immediately I had to stop spanking myself. With the desire gone so was my ability to accept the pain. I never want the spanking to continue after I squirt but when it does and I take the pain from my wife, I am always proud of myself afterwards. It is so important to me to be well punished after my little naughty selfish squirt. It is what renews me and resets my brain.

Instead, I stood there with my shrinking penis inside a masturbation aid unable to continue the punishment that I needed. Looking in the mirror I saw the mixture of post-coitus (fake-coitus) and shame. I pulled my still swollen but no longer erect penis out and it glistened in the harsh lights of the bathroom. The sensations that pushed me to my pre-mature ejaculation moments before were maddening torture as my penis retreated from its lover.

And that's it. I cleaned up, put everything away, got dressed, and went to work. I wish it had been a great experience and a suitable substitute to getting spanked by my wife but it wasn't. It was sort of fun masturbation, of course, and as orgasms go, it was awesome. But ejaculation during a spanking for me isn't about the pleasure but getting it out of the way so that I can truly feel the punishment.